When it’s a slow night for inspiration I always go to the internets number 1 spot for ghetto celeb madness. I know something there will make me laugh.
BIGFOOT’s seed and former backup dancer for BeYONCE, KELLY ROWLAND has had her latest project pushed back like band member MICHELLE’s hairline.
The extra time off will allow KELLY the chance to give her big feet a break.
One of my internets sisters, the MODEL MINORITY always gives me something to think about. She ruminates on missing the KEHINDE WILEY show at the Brooklyn Museum of Art. I did catch the show and I thought that the work was profound. The JEAN MICHEL BASQUIAT show was more extensive than WILEY’s installation, but WILEY’s jawn had more presence.
What riveted me to the paintings were their arrogant regality. I understand that he used the work of 17th century masters to form the backdrop for his series, but there was a louder resonance for me in seeing Black men in this juxtaposition.
CHOCOLATE SNOWFLAKE and I went on a date to the museum to view the exhibit and enjoy the once a month party that the museum hosts every first Saturday of each month. The Brooklyn Museum of Art has presented hundreds of exhibits from Black artists but this was the first that I could remember having prime gallery space on the upper floors. The museum’s gallery was unusually crowded and I found it astonishing to see all the non-Blacks that had come to view the exhibit. I think that it was the very first time that some of these people may have looked into the face of a Black man.
I can’t say I blame them either because you have to be able to look at people as equals on a human level before you can earn the right to look at them as beautiful. WILEY’s portraits were beautiful and bold. They weren’t menacing, but they were also uncomprimising. It was making the statement to me that said, “And what?”
C.S. burst my majestic bubble when she told me that KEHINDE WILEY was a fudge and his subjects were more than likely some of his young paramours. In her opinion the exhibit was cartoonish and it only put the images in the realm of grotesque parody.
Whatever, whatever, at least I got me a free cotton t-shirt from the event.
QUEENS STAND UP! Queens, New York that is.
How sweet is it that the Mets ate the Yankees food this weekend? The Mets should have swept them fags too, but BILLY WAGNER wasn’t built for the bigtime.
“Hey BILLY, your’e not in Kansas anymore you half-a-homo. Get a fuckin’ out bitch!”
Yeah, I have my heckling already in midseason form and I haven’t even been to a game yet. By the buy, I still have a few ‘VOTE FOR PEDRO’ shirts left to hustle. Don’t make ZILLZ buy them all.
You knew the Yanks were fudges anyhoo because STEINBRENNER makes them shave their moustaches before they give him oral. Now YouTube has put their story on Front Street.
In other gaysball news BARRY BONDS a/k/a B.D.B. has tied the all time home run record of America’s most beloved undercover octaroon, BABE RUTH.
The new controversy is that BARRY doesn’t want to sign the baseball since the fan doesn’t want to give it back to him. How teh ghey is all of this ‘ball signing’ nonsense? And how completely teh ghey is the cottage industry that regulates the value of signed balls?!? Every year these homos determine how much the balls of a famous athlete should cost. One year it’s out of the roof and then the next year it’s meh.
I hope that none of your children get hooked into the memorabilia collecting rackets. You can never resell for the book value any of the gay items that you’ve paid a king’s ransom for. The dealers have shitloads of this crap and they prey on the emo sentimentality of kids’ parents. If you want something of value from BARRY BONDS’ career you should find one of his used syringes.
TODD McFARLANE has already bought all of MARK McGUIRE’s dirty needles off eBay.
The movie ‘The DaVINCI Code’ has sparked all kinds of protests, unrest and violence across the globe. My question is could all of this carnage have been avoided if TOM HANKS had a better hairdo? Probably not since when you do a tally by sheer numbers alone Christians outpace Muslims and Jews when it comes to splitting motherfuckers’ wigs.
Irish Afghans hold a ‘sit-in’ to protest the movie in St. Patrick’s Cathedral in Dublin.
The Catholic Church has even had to censure one of it’s leaders for mezzling young padawans.
25 Indians are killed at the Kashmir premier of the movie. Fortunately though, the handmade carpet was already red.
And right here in the States, 5 people were killed at a church service right before the buses were scheduled to leave for an afternoon outing viewing the movie at a local multiplex and then an early buffet dinner at SADIE & CLEON’s Chicken & Waffles Restaurant in Baton Rouge.
All you kids that love the rap music should be mad as hell right now because if a movie with 50 CENT in the the lead role had this kind of hectic weekend opening you know that BILL O’REILLY and OPRAH would be blaming rap music. Why is it that when Black kids kill people the first thing everyone wants to look at is the music that they listen to. I agree that the music that most Black kids hold dear to their little disenfranchised hearts is suspect of poison content, but whoever’s last name is GLOCK has yet to be called to the mat as to why people can kill one another so easily.
The company Smith & Wesson sued the COCOA B’s to cease and desist from using the name SMIF-n-WESSUN. And why?!? Smith & Wesson wants everybody to know and be clear that TEK & STEELE are just hardcore rappers, but we at Smith & Wesson are really killing motherfuckers in these streets.
What it do web-cipher?!? Your’e man fifty-grand is back on this blogrizzle fa’shizzle. We still haven’t ironed out all the coding issues, but I can’t stay out the loop for too long. Like your boy MIKE JONES said, “if you don’t work you don’t eat, if you don’t grind you don’t shine.”
I should have listened to him before I tricked all my paper away on the website’s info tech expert, JACQUI HERNANDEZ. I took her to two sold out concerts featuring the ROOTS, COMMON, MOS DEF, ERYKAH BADU, NAS, JAY-Z and DAVE CHAPPELLE and then she pulls up lame when its time to fix the bugs in the WordPress O.S. Instead she passes me off to some telephone techserve who prah’lee hasn’t had her equipment upgraded since the tsunami.
No, I do not want a quart of dog fried rice! I want my website fixed and I need to have my computer debugged. So now I am put on hold for like an hour and when the chick comes back on the line she gives me the address where I have to take my computer. Alright, let’s see what techs are available on a sunny Saturday afternoon?
O.K. First off, I don’t trust any repairmen that don’t wear undergarments. Unless you are like me, sitting in your parent’s basement, drinking Level vodka mixed with Tropicana Tropics Orange Peach Mango juice from your special cup with the crazy straw, you MUST wear undergarments.
The final verdict is that I need a new flux capacitor for my computer so unless anyone out there has the official bone gristle hook up on a new iMac I will have to keep trying to churn out this blog with my Frankenstein G4.
