CHARGE IT TO THE GAME…

February 9th, 2006

dp.com is for the kids

NahRight.com is hands down one of the internets best rap music sites. If you love arguing with people over the internets about GAY-Z, SHAM’ROCK, PIDDY, FIDDY and layme GAYME you will have a ball with all the assorted characters that frequent the site. They are all individually passionate about Hip-Hop even if the people they love are ultimately dispassionate about their fans.

I used to go there to start trouble but once the kids realized that I was closer in age to 40 than to 30 they stopped paying me any mind. Anyhoo, I can always come here to voice my opinions and be heard by no one. Well not exactly no one, TONY makes sure that he gives me feedback at least once a day so I write this shiite for him(no HEATH LEDGER to that last sentence).

A couple of weeks ago, crappy Philly crapper CASSIDY n/k/a KILLA CAZ was sentenced to 24 weeks of prison for involuntary manslaughter. The jury considered the shooting death of 22year old DESMOND HAWKINS involuntary because CASSIDY had already warned everybody in his song ‘I’ma Hustler’ that, “try to take my cake you gone take a slug”. The jury’s decision was ultimately to charge DESMOND’s death to ‘the game’.

killa caz

Now just this past weekend another person was killed for the sake of producing more ‘real talk’ rap music. ISREAL RAMIREZ was hired to protect BUSTA RHYMES jewelry during a music video shoot in Brooklyn. Fantasy became reality and there ended up being an actual ‘shoot’. RAMIREZ appears to have been the only one injured, but there was a grip of production money wasted in the downtime and postponement of the video. I am sure that Interscope will be charging those fees to BUSTA’s account.

woo hah!

Instead of respecting the crap music code of silence and anonymous innuendo the NYC police are trying to question witnesses. Why can’t the police wait for the single to be released like the rest of us? I don’t blame BUSTA RHYMES either, but this delicate economy has forced even him to consider a makeover in order to remain commercially viable.

Who would have thought that good ol’ fun loving BUSTA RHYMES would embrace the dark side and become a ‘studio gangsta‘? Not to say that BUSTA was ever a punk azz dude, which he was not, he was never someone that was a follower either. As a matter of fact, he was at one time a leader. This I believe is what crap music suffers from now, a lack of real leadership. Label execs fall over one another to recreate last month’s popular record. The format is filled with automatic machine guns, cocaine and strippers repeated ad naseum. People like DESMOND HAWKINS, ISRAEL RAMIREZ and TUPAC SHAKUR are simply the collateral damage in the corporate formula. I think that TUPAC realized this minutes before he died.

tupac knew

“It’s unfortunate that the vehicle that so many can use to make a living is being driven by those that only wish to make a killing.”
-Chuck Dee

MAKE MY DAYBED!

February 9th, 2006

eat wood

California prison inmates are kicking each other’s azzes like they were filming a reality show in the jail. The prison officials were still investigating the cause of the latest disturbance when they decided to lock down all of the county’s jails. I know what these fools problem is… too much free time on their hands.

California jails need to get with the progressive prison program that Iowa detention facilities have adopted. By using their prisons as ‘for profit’ furniture manufacturing enterprises Iowa gets the most out of their ‘state property’. The Iowa inmates create all types of furniture products that increase our quality of life. From parks and recreation furnishings, to library lounge furniture and even furnishings for jails and other detention facilities. This makes incredible fiscal sense when you consider that inmates would take better care in terms of quality and assurance. At least so that they don’t have to be the bitch for someone when their day bed breaks down.

bunk beds

The best idea that Iowa Prison Industries had was to fabricate public school furniture. I like the link that is made by connecting prison inmates with public school children. Just think about how many sex offenders are making the chairs and the seats that those young students will spend countless afternoons sitting on? I can just imagine one of those pervy Iowa inmates taking the time to shape that seat as if it were his own lap.

love chair

Jig and Mexican public school students would do well to study the construction of their school furniture so that when they eventually enter the prison system they will be familiar with the type of craftsmanship they will be expected to turn out.

ALICIA KEYS = Drag Queen

February 9th, 2006

puttin' on the ritz

Guess who decided to put on some lipstick and a dress for a night out on the town???

Grammy loves you fiercely bitch.

“JOHN is Special…”

February 9th, 2006

special

As quoted by the afore-mentioned ALICIA KEYS…

“He’s special. He’s a person that plays and sings and writes his own music, he’s not trying to keep up with the Joneses.”

The JONESES huh, Miss KEYS?!? I don’t know about y’all but I think I smell a catfight between ALICIA and KELIS.

mrs jones

And I don’t know if KELIS is wearing any drawls either because I know she hates to wear bras.

RALPH BAKSHI’s STREET FIGHT

February 8th, 2006

coonskin

SOUNDWAVE gave me this VHS before he went upstate and in my subsequent moves and my brief homelessness I lost my copy. It’s impossible to get from NetFlix since it hasn’t been licensed for DVD format.

You may not be a fan of animation but I would plead with you to give this film a chance. The technique that the filmmaker uses is offbeat and fascinating. The film stars SCATMAN CROTHERS, a young, slim BARRY WHITE and a post-teenage PHILIP MICHAEL THOMAS. All the actors are brilliant during their live action scenes and the dialogue throughout the animation is equally impressive.

The film begins with the attempted escape from prison of those three men. During their escape, SCATMAN CROTHERS tells the tale of BROTHER RABBIT. The storyline of the film centers around the BROTHER RABBIT character as he tries to hustle his way through the big city. The movie is as sharp a satire of the African American’s struggles as any of the best CHAPELLE’s SHOW sketches. The film is offensive to everyone who dislikes having their thoughts provoked.

If you need a real CHAPPELLE SHOW fix, go out and rent this tape. Hell, buy it if you can find it.