CitiBank’s Over-Mortgaged Field Of Dreams…

April 11th, 2007

citifield

Digging up the dirt has only just begun…

I suppose I should be drinking the Kool-Aid that everybody has been serving up. If I let them tell the story the new home for the Mets will be like the infant baby Jesus for this boro in New York City. It will wipe away the eyesore of the ‘Iron Triangle’. A hodgepodge of junkyards and auto body repair shops where Thundercracker, Soundwave and I used to try to sell our stolen cars. The pitch so far has been the percentage of the construction costs that the Mets are ponying up. But inside the fine print I can see that NYC is biting off a far larger chunk than it can chew. Keep in mind that the Yankees are also being gifted with a new facility as well.

It all boils down to real estate and the city government gives it away to sports franchises like a fiefdom. The Big Apple beomes the ‘Big Plum’ for the Yankees, the Mets, the United States Tennis Association and soon, the Nets. No where in America, save for maybe Los Angeles is land this valuable. You have to understand another thing about New York City. It’s essentially a consortium of islands. At some point you run out of land to expand on so you begin to build upwards. This adds exponential value to the land because you can increase your tenancy on the original footprint. Just try to imagine the monthly rents for all the businesses that occupy a fifty story skyscraper. The landlord receives fifty monthly checks twelve times a year. This is why landlords run NYC with an iron fist. They force the politicians to amend the zoning laws and allow them to add fifty more floors to their fifty floor buildings.

It’s like getting free land from the city isn’t enough for the Mets either. In typical fashion they have begun to cut their construction costs by removing features from the facility that were highlights of the initial proposal. They was going to be a field surface that would have been reconfigurable for multi sport use. There were also going to install a high-tech retractable roof, but that design has been kicked to the curb as well. And in the ultimate display of selfish, tacky greed the Mets owners have decided to sell the naming rights to the stadium to CitiBank. Who cares what amount CitiBank is paying them, although the deal that Jay-Z and the Nets got from former slave holders Barclay’s Bank was pretty sweet.

Anyhoo, what CitiBank should do in their ultimate wisdom is cede the name of the park over to a local legend. like CASEY STENGEL CitiPark or JACKIE ROBINSON CitiField. That would be corporate classy and it would allow CitiBank to say, “See, we’re for the community.”

What do you think Mets’ fans?

IMUS? Who The Fuck Is DON IMUS?!?

April 10th, 2007

imus

A picture of DON IMUS’ face for reference…

This nigga DON IMUS should have died like twenty years ago. He’s been stealing HOWARD STERN’s material for at least that many years. Back when I was doing graveyard shifts in the firehouse at Ground Zero we would listen to the FAN with JOE BENIGNO on the overnite and then IMUS would come on at 6am. We’d listen to dude for exactly 25 minutes until STERN’s show started their broadcast day. Nobody listens to fucking IMUS!

This whole tempest in a teacup is just like the JANET JACKSON tittie fiasco because no one actually saw the tittie until the image hit the internets. And no one listened to the DON IMUS show until NBC/Universal begged YouTube to spotlight this azzcrack’s video. How lame must dude be to have to steal material from HOWARD STERN? That’s the only reason that dude should be fired, because he’s a laaaaaaaame. I respect AL SHARPTON’s grizzly one-hundred percent, but why haven’t we gotten RUSSELL SIMMONS and LYOR COHEN fired for the incessant mysoginistic bullshit cRap music they have peddled for the last decade or more? Them two niggers need to be unemployed fa’rizzle. IMUS? Not so much. His old azz should already be dead.

Most importantly, everyone knows that Division 1-A ladies basketball players are not ho’s but thoroughbred dykes. Have you seen Tennessee’s coach PAT SUMMIT. Her penis is bigger than most men’s joints. And I don’t even look at penises like that unless it’s a pr0n movie and you can’t help but see them sometimes because of the camera angles. No DENNIS RODMAN to all of this penis talk.

Most of those Rutgers dyke chicks will end up becoming lipstick lesbians like LISA LESLIE (killer alliteration) have kids and settle down as soccer moms. By that time IMUS will have died again and be long forgotten in the annals of broadcasting. Ha! I said IMUS likes anal. Who the fuck cares about DON IMUS and the dykes? Lip gloss lesbians are all the rage right now.

RESPECT THE ARCHITECTS…

April 10th, 2007

adams

I always use images from my favorite comicbook artist JOHN BYRNE and FRANK MILLER when I am discussing comics and their storytelling, but I have only hinted at the artist that gave birth to both of their styles. NEAL ADAMS was one of the great graphic storytellers that comics has ever known. He took the art to another level from the classic predecessors JACK KIRBY, JOE SIMON and STEVE DITKO. He was the pioneer that took comicbooks from being campy kids play into the aspect of adult entertainment.

I first found NEAL ADAMS work during my X-Men collecting heydays. He drew a series of books before the original title was put on hiatus. His details were so fucking killer. He would draw a close up of a character yelling and you could see the linework in the character’s teeth. NEAL ADAMS also broke through the traditional story board framework that comics employed by illustrating characters stretching and arching all over a page. His work suggested movement like no one else did on a flat two-dimensional plane.

adams

The other thing that NEAL ADAMS did with his writing partner DENNIS O’NEILL was to bring current adult themes into their storylines. Batman became darker and more brooding. Green Arrow and Green Lantern weren’t just fighting super-powered bad guys either. They were battling drug dealers and racism. ADAMS brought his sense of politics and justice into his art way back in the 60’s. FRANK MILLER would do the same almost twenty years later.

adams
adams

NEAL ADAMS touched all the iconic heroes that DC Comics had under their banner. He drew tons of Green Lantern Green Arrow issues and even did some work on Superman. Though I am mostly fond of his Batman artwork which went against the campy, clownish Batman character that was popular during the 1960’s due to the televison program. NEAL ADAMS’ Batman was a dark, determined bruiser. The Joker character under ADAMS became more of a violent sociopath as well. This theme inspired future artists and storytellers to design these iconic characters as complex and conflicted individuals. No one surpasses MILLER’s treatment of Batman in the ‘Dark Knight Returns’ series, but you can see how he literally and figuratively used NEAL ADAMS’ pencil lines to trace the outline for his epoch epic.

adams
adams
adams
adams

SNEAKER FIENDS UNITE!

April 9th, 2007

batgirl

Where the ladies at?!?

NIKE hi-top ‘Batgirl’ Dunks will be looking so boss with your tapered skinny jeans on, especially all my ladies that are cute in the face and thick in the waist. Send me a pic.

Chea!

goldenrods

The Addict Comes Out Of The Closet…

April 9th, 2007

african dandy

Extra nullus to that headline…

You have seen my proclivity for POLO and NIKE Air Max but I don’t think I have shown you how serious shit can really get. When you are a representative for the classic streetwear lifestyle you have to touch all the bases just to show the kids how it’s done properly. If the weather had been warmer this past weekend I was gonna hurt the streets with a dandy little Easter outfit.

Pictured below is a pair of Easter Egg Air Max 180 along with a cotton mesh POLO knit top and a pair of NIKE Dri-Fit knit socks. I also prah’lee would have popped the tags on a pair of Levis that I caught on clearance at Marshalls ($7.00 bitches!).

I.T.'s

The outfit is sharp and clean but I needed a chapeau to top off this setup properly. Real men should always wear a hat on the first day of the week anyhoo in deference to AUM, the bringer of life. I know I wanted a fitted cap to spice this look and I knew where I had to go to copp the right one.

richies

RICHIE’s on Delancey Street is one of the holdover sneaker and streetwear emporiums from the real days of the L.E.S. There are so many sneaker boutiques in the area now, but RICHIE’s keeps it realer than most. On a good day you can catch some Dunks up in there for forty or even thirty cent. And since they are part of that classic Delancey Street network you can politic your prices with the manager. If I am copping two I.T.’s you best believe I am getting some money knocked off top. That’s one of the main reasons I loved shopping in Paris. Middle East cats love to haggle over price and since I am Hebrew that shit is in my bloodline.

yankee fitted
yankee fitted
yankee fitted

RICHIE’s has more fitted caps than the New Era store and his prices are way better. Amidst the flood of Yankee caps I find the joint that I am going to fucks with on my setup. Lucky for me RICHIE’s is having a sale and the joint is only $10 cent.

Aww shit y’all! Holler at a clean azz, dandy azz nigga when you see him on the streets.

yankee fitted
I.T.'s