Archive for the ‘C.R.E.A.M.’ Category

Reflection Eternal For HURRICANE STARRKEYSHA

Wednesday, August 30th, 2006

here comes the sun lil darling

Editor’s Note: CHOCOLATE SNOWFLAKE took a trip to New Orleans to survey first hand the devastation left in the wake of Hurricane Katrina. She took a ton of pictures and then wrote me an emotional and heartfelt letter after returning to her hotel. It’s still impossible for me to imagine that America the beautiful could be mismanaged into Third World status, but the rate at which we have failed to prioritize our homeland concerns over liberating foreigners and subsequently have continued to give billions in aid to everyplace else, there may come the day when many other U.S. cities resemble the Ninth Ward.

My dearest of all,

New Orleans is a strange city. I imagine it was strange before Hurricane Katrina, but the ways in which the graciousness and hospitality of the people made up for the strangeness no longer hold. Not that folks aren’t still gracious. Quite the contrary, the degree of courtesy and the welcoming attitude is by far the most refreshing aspect of this trip. It’s just that it’s not quite enough to cover the economic and racial fault lines Hurricane Katrina exposed.

At our meeting today, a gentleman whose family encompasses three generations of progressive unionism spoke to us about what’s going on in the Southern Crescent, as he called it. The politicians, many of whom were elected on the backs of the labor movement — which comprises mostly of teachers and manual laborers — and the christian charity network of churches, have seized the “opportunity” presented by Hurricane Katrina to try to break the unions and eradicate anything resembling a living wage.

The public schools were devastated by Hurricane Katrina. The school system lost millions of dollars in facilities and supplies — libraries, books, pencils, calculators, desks, etc. — not to mention the emotional toll it’s taken on the children who look toward the routine of school and seeing their classmates as a constant in lives that are already in turmoil by displacement. AFT, the teacher’s union, has raised a million and a half dollars which it has distributed directly to teachers in the form of cash grants to help them get situated, and find temporary shelter for them and their families.

So what does New Orleans do? They fire all the teachers, reconstitute the public schools as charter schools and tell teachers they’ll rehire them but only as non-union employees. If teachers are caught discussing they’re salaries, they’re fired. Students who can’t afford charter schools get rerouted to other districts, or are given vouchers for partial payment of tuition (with no collatoral to fund the other half) or are simply told that their schools won’t be rebuilt and that the teachers aren’t coming back. Naturally this impacts poor students, many of whom happen to be black and Latino.

Mayor Nagin has apparently also decided to locate a garbage dump — where all the debris from the “clean up” will be deposited — in the middle of an impoverished Vietnamese community that abuts a nature preserve.

The downtown area, where I’m staying, is a twilight zone. Within a two block radius of my hotel, you’d never know that a natural disaster went down. But turn a wrong corner and the smell, the boarded up stores, the watermarks on the buildings and the nastiest pigeons I have ever seen tell another story.

It may sound trivial, but when the pigeons — the pentultimate urban scavenger — are scrawny oily-necked avian refugees with matted feathers openly squabbling in the street over a crust of old bread smeared with shit, you know it’s bad.

The upcoming elections here are a joke. 26 contenders and not one of them able to do a damn thing about anything. Everyone I’ve spoken to laughs at Nagin, but the alternatives are insiders, the insiders’ insiders and the crazy uncle who prah’lee molested someone or something at some point and can’t get a job doing anything else. So he might as well be mayor.

The most tragic thing of all is that our people — and by that I mean simply human beings, our brothers, our sisters, our children, our parents — suffer while 20 miles away someone is sitting quite comfortably in their living room, watching it all on the evening news.

My cab driver from the airport — her father died in a hospital during Hurricane Katrina.

The porter, Ken, who brought my bags up, fled for his life to Texas with his parents in tow and was only able to return because he works at the only union hotel in town and therefore had a job waiting for him when the place reopened. He’s crashing on a friend’s couch because he can’t afford an apartment. His rent used to be $500 for a one bedroom; now, with the lack of housing and a general state of desperation, one bedrooms go for anything from $800 to $2300.

RiverWalk, the Mississippi River promenade where you can buy beignets and cafe au lait has been cleaned, Foot Locker has reopened, but the library is still boarded up and there are no public schools.

The moneyed elite has figured out that with HK, they can rebuild the city the way they want — New Orleans used to be a 70% black city, now it’s about 30-40% and dropping — as people seem less and less inclined to return to no homes, no jobs, no churches, no neighborhoods and the city uses eminent domain to seize their property for redevelopment.

But folks sure can drink and play some music. Whoo-wee. Good times.

As our speaker said today: The Southern Crescent of Missouri, Louisiana and Alabama was, according to the census, the poorest in the nation in the 1930s, the poorest in the 1960s and remained the poorest in 2000. The Federal Government didn’t abandon these people after Hurricane Katrina. They were abandoned a long time ago. Katrina just blew the covers off the bed of neglect on which Fat Cats, Greed and Corruption indulge in an unholy menage-a-disaster.

It’s depressing beyond belief. And I get to go home on Sunday. Can you imagine how depressed some of these folks must be?

Well, I’m thoroughly sick and disgusted. Tomorrow we go out and build a house for someone. It’s a drop, but even a drop is better than nothing. In the meantime, I’m going to lie on the bed, turn on the TV and escape into the 100 Most Shocking Moments on Television. Its a VH1 Marathon, so I’m guaranteed no Katrina coverage.

Love you, miss you,
C.S.

ELIOT SPITZER For GOVERNOR! (2006 B.W.A. Nominee)

Wednesday, August 23rd, 2006

time to get pizzaid

That’s right bitches, I am officially ready to sell out.

But I am doing it in order to help DALLAS PENN continue the good work that is this website. With gas prices on a steady incline and all sorts of other inter-related costs on the rise I have heard through the grapvine that DP.Com may dissolve before it’s first birthday. That means that I will have to go back to writing an e-mail blast that no one ever reads. That means that all of the DP.Com video projects that are in pre/post production as well as the ADDICT website will be folded. I love this webshiite more than a shwarma sammich with a side of babaghanouj so I will do everything in my power to keep it “in the Black.”

The New York Times ran an article today about New York State gubernatorial hopeful Attorney General ELIOT SPITZER having a campaign war chest of some $20million dollars. This amount dwarfs all of the Republican candidates combined by some… twenty million dollars. What ELIOT SPITZER needs now is a ‘political consultant’. To this extent I am willing to offer my services(N.H.) to Governor Attorney General SPITZER to help propel his campaign into the top spot in Albany. I know that I haven’t got any of the credentials that your typical political consultant might have like say, a college degree, but I’ve got chutzpah dammit. And I have a .pdf file of the daily schedule from KARL ROVE’s palm pilot.

So what would KARL ROVE do? After choking his mother with a pillow at 9:00am and drinking the bone marrow from a newborn baby at 10:00am, he would plot a kick azz strategy that would be much more about reminding folks of their emotional baggage than telling them what they really need to get by. To that extent I would prah’lee further criminalize Blacks and Muslims. I know that seems to be the cheap and easy way out, but I was going to use this campaign strategy for the almost Republican candidate RANDY DANIELS before the upstate G.O.P. bosses frowned on the thought of a jig Governor in the Albany statehouse. Damn Randy we wuz’ close!

alt reality gov

Anyhoo, I know that I called the good and just Attorney General ELIOT SPITZER an ‘invisible man‘ due to his marked disappearance from the political radar during the NYC transit strike, but that was way back in the past and I think that bygones should be bygones. Middle Passage?!? Is that a hallway in the center of a building? Who knows? All I know is that $20 million dollars is a lot of money to jump out of the gate with. Governor Attorney General SPITZER’s closest competitor for the Dem nod is Nassau County’s Executive THOMAS SUOZZI. To be truthful, the only thing that SUOZZI has going for him is the fact that since HUGH CAREY in 1974, the last name of New York’s Governor usually ends with a vowel.

But all of that history won’t be enough to stop the SPITZER Express once BILLY SUNDAY is hired as a ‘consultant’. I promise I will get the jig vote out. How about a party at Cipriani hosted by PIDDY and AL SHARPTON?

rev al

I am pretty sure that I can get one or two of the jigs from that show ‘The Apprentice’ to come through and holler at the peoples. Plus a song from MARY J. BLIGE, everybody loves M.J.B. The long suffering Negro spiritual R&B has pretty much replaced the space that the Black church once held as the barometer for jig morality. And nobody cries more than Mary.

m.j.b.

I will line up all of this talent to secure the African American vote for only $150K and this includes an open bar from 6:00pm until 7:00pm.

Governor SPITZER, holler at your boy!

The Secret War On The Old EARTH (2006 B.W.A. Nominee)

Tuesday, August 22nd, 2006

the old earth

An article in the March ’06 Harpers Magazine exposed the genocidal griminess of the medical industrial complex. The article opened with the story of a working class mother from Memphis who was pregnant and coerced into taking an HIV test. She received a false positive and since the doctors didn’t administer a back up test she was labeled to have HIV. Fearful that she would pass the HIV to her yet unborn child she agreed to become part of a clinical trial that was using a combination of anti-HIV drugs. What she and the other women in this trial were not told was that the drugs that they would be receiving were actually pathogens. Designed to break down the immune system by giving it toxins that the body would have to fight. The duration that these toxins needed to destroy their host was the true subject of the study.

This particular woman, JOYCE ANN HAFFORD, a healthy 33yr. old probably didn’t have HIV, but she had the disease with the deadliest combinations of symptoms inside of America. She was a Black, single, working-poor mother. Mrs.HAFFORD used the HIP centers and the free clinics that so many of us rely upon inside of our cities. When you are uninsured and unable to afford the services provided at a private practice you become the human equivalent of a test animal. In the case of Mrs.HAFFORD, her demise was from massive organ failure and not AIDS.

Pharmaceutical companies, with the blessings of the Federal Drug Administration and the National Institutes of Health use urban health clinics to sample thousands of proposed trial medications. Many of these trials test the levels at which patients can consume lethally toxic drugs. This is far worse than the Tuskeegee study which was about administering a debilitating, albeit non-lethal, dose of syphillis to men and analyzing the effects over time.

The drugs used in these trials were known for their rampant toxicity. AZT in a branded combination called Combivir was lauded for the test tube trials in which it killed HIV-infected blood cells and prevented them from replicating. The truth is that AZT prevents all cells from reproducing and kills all cells especially healthy ones is not the info that is put on the table. Instead I see MAGIC JOHNSON doing ads for pharmacuetical giant Glaxo-SmithKline. This is the same company that has been sued by African nations for price gouging on its medical patents. Apparently the only drugs that Glaxo will give away for free are the ones that will kill you quickly.

What is also becoming apparent is that HIV/AIDS does not have a clear definition or symptomology. Did you know that depending on what country in Africa you are from determines your presumed HIV status? The World Health Organizations give pharmaceutical giants free reign to distribute any trial medications throughout the continent. I can accept the genocide that is waged daily on African peoples in Africa because I am not over there. I will not accept the genocide that is being administered on intraveneous drug users and Black women right here in my community. When you watch OPRAH this afternoon peep how many commercials she runs for prescription drugs. You better believe someone is making her rich when she says that down-low Black men are responsible for the spike in African American women contracting HIV. EDDIE MURPHY can’t be having sex with everybody. OPRAH is going to have to stop co-signing these pharmaceutical companies on the one hand and then posing as a champion of Black womanhood on the other side.

Pharmaceutical giants, the FDA and the National Institutes of health are fighting a secret war against the old Earths. Will you take a stand?

rest in peace mrs.francis

HI HO! HI HO! Its Off to Work We Go (2006 B.W.A. Nominee)

Monday, August 21st, 2006

ralph kramden

The fantasy that I had about blue collar workers getting their life affirming kudos has finally been burst. The transit workers have decided to go back to work without a contract and I can’t totally blame them because if I go more than a week without my digit, it’s time for me to take out the old ski mask (and my fat azz can’t run like I did when I was eighteen).

What I have gleaned from this non-event is that there is no shortage of robberbarons, crooks and fools managing this city. They are complicit with the corporations and buisnessmen that fund their campaigns. In the end it will be the transit workers, the sanitation workers, the teachers, the police, the firefighters and the balance of civil servants that keep this city running to make sure that the center holds.

I made a quick reference guide for anyone who is interested in learning who the players were in this latest municipal debacle…

Roger the dodger ROGER TOUISSANT
The biggest problem with the TWU president is that he has a French surname and he speaks with a British accent. The whole “schwarze in the fancy schmatte” routine was already done by that wannabe Semitic supremacist, whatshisname, so I won’t really go there, but c’mon party people admit it, he didn’t do an adequate job of preparing his membership for this contingency.

The MTA was founded by mega rich billionaires (that’s billions in 1901 money too) who don’t take kindly to threats from the hired help. You can’t challenge billionaires to share their money. You challenge billionaires on their humanity and their credibility. The TWU president could have used a campaign strategist. Too bad KARL ROVE is a Sith officer. ROVE has the guile for publicly charged emotional campaigns. Oh, and yeah, did I mention that TOUISSANT is Black!


duh, which way did he go? PETER KALIKOW
The MTA chairman reinforces my long held stereotype that there is an inverse relationship between wealth and intelligence. I can’t totally blame him though because he is managing money that was created by other, much smarter people. With a daily ridership of over 7 million people, multiplied by $2 per ride and 365 days a year, you are looking at one helluva Christmas bonus. Do you think Mr.KALIKOW could find it in the agency budget to upgrade the subway comfort stations so that I don’t have to piss on the tracks?

PETER KALIKOW is to New York State Governor GEORGE PATAKI what ex-FEMA Director MIKE BROWN is to GEORGE BUSH. Just two kooky frat boys having fun with a billion dollar taxpayer beer bong.


I have an umbrella GOVERNOR GEORGE PATAKI
GEORGE PATAKI could have been a presidential contender in another reality where we don’t vote for someone based on how they look or how well they speak. Despite the fact that the Governor talks out of the side of his mouth — not because that’s a technique for politicians, but because he was bitten by a deer tick while hiking through the Catskills — PATAKI has always bested any challengers for his Albany seat. No homo.

However when the shit hits the fan, the Governor is continually forced to hold the umbrella for more charasmatic downstate politicos like RUDOLPH GIULIANI and now MICHAEL BLOOMBERG.


da' Mayor MAYOR MICHAEL BLOOMBERG
When the Mayor of New York City calls the transit workers “thugs” you can be sure that he didn’t mean it in the friendly rap music sense of the word. The Mayor of New York City might be one of America’s richest men, so we can’t really expect him to worry about whether transit workers can afford to put their kids through college.

Can I be honest with y’all? This mayor dresses even better than former Mayor DAVID DINKINS did. I would forego healthcare and a retirement package to polish his shoes. I’d probably make twice what those transit humps make too.


the pretender ATTORNEY GENERAL ELLIOT SPITZER
Surprisingly silent and invisible during this labor disagreement has been the pretender to the New York State gubernatorial throne. Only a few weeks prior, the attorney general was chasing down phony charities. The scope of this situation must have been too large for the attorney general’s pedigree. His silence has spoken volumes.

Good luck in November Invisible Man.


Uncle Bootsy SATCHEL ‘BOOTSY’ SUNDAY
My uncle worked for the NYC transit system for just over thirty years. Unfortunately he passed away from cardiovascular disease before his retirement.

My fondest memories of my uncle were the times I would be waiting for the subway to arrive and as the train barrelled into the platform he would spot me from the motorman booth and yell my name. When he was a driver on the independent lines I got a chance to ride along with him in the driver cab. The R-46 is still my favorite device in the system.

The drivers and the conductors that work several stories under the Earth in pitch black darkness, moving those metal crates back and forth day after day, are people that I admire and respect. They allow me the chance to daydream for a few minutes before reality sets in and I have to walk out into the light.

Thanks Uncle Bootsy.

NICOLE RITCHIE = Gangsta Bitch (2006 B.W.A. Nominee)

Sunday, August 20th, 2006

mugshot nicki

America! Don’t be fooled by this tragic mulatto debutante and her cotillion curls. NICOLE RICHIE is a cold-blooded killer.

I think I may have solved the murder of ISRAEL RAMIREZ. Bear with me for a sec internets fam…

CHOCOLATE SNOWFLAKE loves to watch Law & Order: Criminal Intent, but that show pisses me off because they are always solving crimes in under an hour. It’s been how many years since TUPAC and B.I.G. were killed and nobody has even been indicted. Those fucks from Law & Order would have solved this shit by now along with the JONBENET case.

dead

So while she watched the tube I fucked(no brokeback) around on the internets. I wanted to see what the jigs were up to so I started with the CRUNK & Disorderly website. C & D is cute and it’s easy to navigate because there aren’t too many bells and whistles. Not like her sister friend’s site BEAUTIFUL HUSTLE, which is visually stunning, but busy as all get out. So anyhoo, I linked from C & D to another website showcasing the jig madness, called CONCRETE LOOP. The post that comes up is the one detailing BUSTA RHYMES post-op haircut interview at an L.A. radio station.

bussabus

In the interview BUSTA had some slick sideways shit to say about PIDDY, which lead the Hip-Hop cops to shadow SEAN just in case they could put another gun charge on the kid. But I found BUSTA’s remark about “LIONEL RICHIE’s daughter” to be the real clue. Why couldn’t BUSTA come out and say her name? Was it LIONEL RICHIE who orchestrated the hook-up? Here was the real mystery…

Dun-dun


Editor’s note: Whenever you see the above phrase; dun-dun, it is your cue to imagine the endscene sound effect from Law & Order

So why would LIONEL RICHIE set up his daughter with BUSTA? Keep in mind that NICOLE is adopted so LIONEL RICHIE could technically enjoy that young poon himself, a la WOODROW.

wood yi

I think your boy LIONEL RICHIE is a capo, and he is connected to the Care Free Curls Mafia.

capo status

LIONEL RICHIE had been trying to recruit BUSTA prior to him cutting his locks. NICOLE RICHIE was like an offering to BUSTA because his hair had grown so long. If LIONEL RICHIE could convince BUSTA to join him in the CFCM can you imagine what a boon to the hair care industry that might have been, let alone the SoftSheen-Carson bottom line? But then BUSTA double-crossed them and cut off his hair. LIONEL RICHIE did the only thing that you can do when someone backs out on their word. He sent in his goons.

Dun-dun


Well actually, he sent his wild whoreish daughter who wasn’t much of a good shot to begin with. She disguised herself as a homeless derelict, which everyone assumed to be TONY YAYO since he is like 50yrs. old and has been seen digging through garbage cans.

yayo

She tried to gain access onto the video production set. This was a good idea since there were reportedly five entertainers and almost 500 umbrella holders on the set. Everybody knows that crapper entourages love hitting up the free sody pop at the craft services tent. When security denied NICOLE RICHIE, disguised as a homeless person, possibly TONY YAYO, entry onto the set she flipped out and started blasting.

Dun-dun

richie and rocket man

I don’t blame BUSTA for being shook neither. The thing about the CFCM is that they are in the highest positions in the entertainment world. When MICHAEL JACKSON tried to get out of the CFCM by relaxing his hair you see how quickly they brought him down. Word on the street is that the Care Free Curls Mafia already has their sights set on another rapper.

dusty jim

This episode also gave me a clearer perspective on how the big homie LIONEL RICHIE stacks all that paper.

Activator residuals biatch!

love my curl