Archive for the ‘Billy Sunday @ XXL’ Category

cRap Music Fantasy League Q4 Update Wk.3

Friday, October 26th, 2007

t.i.

Complex? Very…

The fourth quarter is fully underway now in the cRap Music Fantasy League and the big dogs are coming out to play. If ypou have Jay-Z, Foxy Brown, T.I. and Fifty Cent on your rosters you can expect to be in the hunt for these free sneakers down the stretch. The question is… Who are the dark horses this quarter that will put your team over the top? Common could be one if his album ever goes platinum. Cam’Ron? Lil’ Kim? I can’t call it until December 31st. Just get ready to see a whole lot of lead changes.

Here’s a breakdown of the scores for the entire league…

Krack Ko Kaine Entertainment 5075
Incilin Productions 4875
Gain Green Records 4475
WindBreaker Records 4225
America Done Fell Off Records 4175
WDISL Records 3900
Gunshine State Music 3800
All Starz Entertainment 3675
Open Cannister Recordz 3650
Funk Town Records 3625
The Nappy Ram Affiliates 3575
Pretty Dollar Entertainment 3275
Jesus Slap Boxers 3250
CRap-A-lot Records 3250
Candyland Records 3200
Beat Break Records 3025
Bang 2 Dis Entertainment 2900
Berries & Cream Records 2800
North Star Records 2800
WTF Records 2750
Media Whore Records 2725
NYC Records 2700
Bodega Inc 2650
Combat Jack Records 2650
Fantasy Records 2525
MIP Records 2450
Solutions Global Media 2450
329 Music 2425
Death On Arrival Records 2425
SayDatNuccaName Wreckids 2350
Fuckin Sellout Records 2150
Talent Show Entertainment 2050
Vagina Crusher Records 2050
DubbleUp Entertainment 2025
Bottlenecks Records 2000
Barely Literate Entertainment 2000
Mental Calisthenics 1600
ASE Records 1450
The Block Is Hot Music Group 1400
New Black Money Records 1400
Brick Productions 1300
Know The Limit Records 1175
County Of Kings Records 925
BLZ Records 575
Detroit In Dis Bitch Records 275
Six Feet Deep Promotions 200

Belize, at least you still got a shot at winning the DP Dot Com Football Pool.

The Brown Fox Kicks Rocks In The Box…

Wednesday, October 24th, 2007

fox

Did you know that Doctor Billy Sunday writes a daily column at XXL Mag Dot Com?

Foxy Brown is actually saving the Hip-Hop generation with her incarceration. Not because there’s less nail salon techs getting thumped on, or conversely less people getting pistol grip whipped with Blackberrys, but because she is showing us the price we pay when we don’t confront mental illness directly. In the hierarchy of shit that is bad for your rap career actually being 7-30 is the worst thing. It’s even worse for selling records than being a lady rapper. Foxy Brown is trying to come up in the game with two strikes against her. Let’s be honest with each other, when was the last time you considered copping a lady rapper’s record? You need to consider this new Foxy disc then, if for no other reason but to help ol’ girl get the treatment she needs for being insane in the membrane.

Being 7-30 in the African American community is also effed up too since we tend not to be able to afford to place our families in the institutions on the outskirts of town where crazy people are kept. Before you can even get into one of those facilities you have to be diagnosed by a physician. When is the last time you saw a Black person going to a doctor? I mean a real doctor, not some motherfucker in a white jacket at the clinic. This is because the African American community itself has a deserved distrust for the practice of medicine and frequently shuns receiving prescription drugs. Except for those of us with the sugar. I’ll do anything to keep from getting insulin shots. So now Foxy Brown’s situation highlights what we face when we don’t get the medical attention we need.

Since I went to a community college instead of an Ivy League school I gained an education that allows me to combine many trades simultaneously. Community college degrees are the equivalent of staying a month at a Holiday Inn Express. I will put on my Dr. Billy Sunday stethoscope and propose that we create a treatment program for Foxy Brown. We’ll also combine this with a marketing campaign for her latest album. Instead of creating a show where entertainment industry has-beens lose weight we make a show where we get psychological treatment to crazy ass rappers. The first season will have us trying to get Foxy some anger management counseling and medication for her bi-polar affliction. We’ll also feature Lil’ Kim as she plunges further into her plastic surgery fetish, and we’ll go to the STD clinic, then afterwards the clubs with Trina. Lastly, we will follow around Amil as she tries to shop her material for another album. Are you not entertained?

Okay, so maybe we need to consider another marketing plan. How about an instructional shoplifting video? ‘Crank Dat Pilfer’, ‘Shoplift Dat Ho?. If we get thirteen year old white chicks to make YouTube videos of this shit we’ll be like thousandaires, or hundredaires, or something rich. At the end of the day even marketing campaigns are foolish for someone who is fucking crazy. And Foxy Brown is fucking crazy. Record labels don’t offer health plans with their deals and since Foxy is signed to Koch or some shit I don’t even think they have a box of band-aids in their office. Before she goes on to promote her new record she needs to get herself examined and treated. For all she knows she could very well be pregnant with a demon spawn that is making her act so banana head.

FYI: If Foxy is indeed pregnant you will get extra points in the cRap Music Fantasy League.

cRap Music Moguls Unite!

Monday, October 22nd, 2007

lyor chaka

Here’s a chance for you to get to know some of the label owners that are playing in 2007 Q4 edition of the DP Dot Com cRap Music Fantasy League. The best thing about the cMFL is that you really don’t have to a fan of rap music to be a good label owner. If you read the newspaper or the police blotter with any regularity you could put together a roster that scores a lot of points. DALLAS asked all the label owners a few questions to learn what their rap music pedigree was and how they came to love the music that I control. That’s ‘I’ as in T.I.

1) Who is your favorite rap artist?
2) What is your favorite rap song?
3) What is the first rap record/album/CD that you purchased?
4) Why would a rapper want to sign with your label?

After I read some of the replies I selected a few label owners to highlight…

saydatnuccaname SAYDATNUCCANAME WREKKIKDS
1. Ghostface Killah
2. ATCQ – ‘Scenario’
3. Arrested Development – ‘3 Years, 5 Months, & 2 Days in the Life Of…’
4. At SayDatNuccaName Wrekkids, we have no problem calling these other cRappers out and shittin’ on their whole steez. If you ain’t rollin’ wit’ SayDatNuccaName then you may as well kill yo’ self.

gunshine state records GUNSHINE STATE MUSIC
1. Eminem
2. Nas – ‘Memory lane’
3. D12 – ‘D12 World
4. no B.S’n here, just make good music…

berries n cream BERRIES & CREAM RECORDS
1. Masta Ace. I dont really like the term rap artist, but err um MC, rap artist whatever.
2. Big L – ‘Danger Zone’
3. The 1st album I bought? WTF kinda question is that?! Cuz we used to steal you know how niggaz is? Maybe. Anyways I guess it would be Da Lench Mob Guerillas in da Mist because it was in a dollar bin and I was like Oh Shit Ice Cube son! He an angry nigga like me so I copped it.
4. A rapper would want to sign with us because we give them Berries and Cream. Plus we do their marketing, promotion, give them a $250,000 advance and make sure that they get 5 cent for every album sold and 25 cents for every ringtone sold. What more do these greedy niggaz need jeez? No publishing rights though. We got to keep those safe because you never know who might get killed.

crap a lot CRAP-A-LOT RECORDS
1. jiggaman
2. big – ‘juicy’
3. 2pac – makaveli
4. ‘coz i’ma merk ’em otherwise

krack kokaine KRACK KO KAINE ENTERTAINMENT
1. Biggie Smalls
2. Black Sheep – ‘Choice Is Yours’
3. Whodini – ‘Escape’
4. Because we international and you’re just local!!!!

combat jack COMBAT JACK RECORDS
1. jay-z
2. tie between jay z & b.i.g – ‘brooklyn’s finest’
dre and snoop – ‘deep cover’
nice & smooth & gangstarr – ‘dwyck’
main source – ‘looking at the front door’
b.i.g – ‘unbelievable’
2pac – ‘hit em up’
public enemy – ‘rebel w/o a pause’
m.o.p. – ‘ante up’
mobb deep – ‘shook ones, pt.2’
o.c. – ‘time’s up’
t.ski valley – ‘catch the beat’
bdp – ‘bridge is over’
bdp – ‘my philosophy’
jay z – ‘takeover’
nas – ‘ether’
rakim – ‘my melody’
rakim – ‘I know you got soul’
jay z – ‘where I’m from’
jay z – ‘you must love me’
ulta-magnetic mcs – ‘ego trippin’
tim dogg – ‘eff compton’
common sense – ‘bitch in you’
nwa – ‘straight outta compton’
nwa – ‘fuck the police”
gangstarr – ‘just to get a rep’
special ed – ‘i got it made’
big daddy kane – ‘warm it up kane’
brand nubian – ‘allah u akbar’
brand nubian – ‘punks jump up to get beatdown’
b.i.g – ‘machine gun funk’
b.i.g. – ‘warning’
b.i.g. ’10 crack commandments'”
b.i.g. – ‘what’s beef’
b.i.g. feat. eminem – ‘dead wrong’
b.i.g. – ‘kick in the door’
cam’ron feat jay-z – ‘welcome to new york city’
cam’ron – ‘killa kam’
busta rhymes – ‘put your hands where my eyes can see’
run dmc – ‘sucker mcs’
run dmc – ‘run’s house’
run dmc – ‘rock box’
m.o.p. feat jay z – ‘4 alarm blaze’
juice crew – ‘symphony’
biz markie – ‘vapors’
geto boys – ‘mind playin tricks’
scar face – ‘seen a man die’
kanye west – ‘can’t tell me nothing’
big daddy kane – ‘young, gifted and black’
epmd – everything from 1st four albums except ‘you drink too much’ and ‘it’s time to party’
audio two – ‘top billin’
lauryn hill – ‘lost ones’
fresh 3 mcs’ – ‘f.r.e.s.h.’
dougie fresh and slick rick – ‘the show’
queen latifah – ‘wrath of my madness’
lil kim feat jay z – ‘big momma thing’
lil kim feat diddy – ‘no time’
mc lyte – ‘cram to understand’
ll cool j – ‘momma said’
3. kurtis blow – ‘ego trip’
4. Combat Jack’s 5 Gulliest Moments In The Music Business

t.i.

Mr.WEST says…
Do me a favor fam and choose 50 because my ass is wore’d out from SNL repeating the show featuring me again this past weekend.

They need to just go ‘head and hire me in place of that homo homeboy they fired, What his name was… FINESSE? [ll]

yeWest

Whites Were The Original Niggers…

Sunday, October 21st, 2007

og

BILLY X. SUNDAY school everyday at XXL Mag Dot Com

Instead of trying to stop people from using the word nigger we should be trying to have as many people use the word as possible. That is how you put the word in its proper place. For generations it has been a term of derision for African Americans and no Black people have been courageous enough to study the roots of the word. Not the Alex Haley ‘Roots’ which are powerful for sure, but the etymology roots, the beginnings, the genesis, the O.G. usage. It wasn’t a bad word in the beginning because it described someone’s occupation.

In America we have done such a good job of reconfiguring language that most of us don’t recognize what we are describing when we talk. That’s why your cousin Billy Sunday comes here to XXL Mag Dot Com. I come to bring the light to the dark. Not that Dark, because I don’t think he has the mental capacity to go in too deep. The dark in the figurative obfuscated sense. I imagine that’s why most of you come to these threads in the first place. You want someone to make some semblance of sense out of this fucked the fuck up American pie. Since you came through, let’s go in…

The roots of the word nigger are northern European. The Dutch settlers that came to America to find their fortune were land owners back in their old country. Who else would have the scrilla to contract a ship to bring them across the Atlantic? These wealthy land owners were enticed at the idea of the Americas being a land of gold and riches. In order to build their settlements and their communities over here similar to the establishments they held in Europe they had to bring their entire staff as well.

You don’t think they made their sons and daughters build their houses do you? That back breaking manual labor was the job for their indentured servants. The settlers charged their servants money to come over here. The idea was that the settler would grant their servants a plot of land to live and which to farm just as they did in the Netherlands or whatever they called that shit they came from. What the settlers realized was that there was a shitload of land here in the Americas and to settle all of it, because let’s be honest, when is white ever gonna be happy with just owning half of everything, they would need more laborers.

og

The Indians were bad laborers. Now when I say Indians I am referring to the ancestors of the dudes that drink too much and own all the fucking casinos. Not the dudes that can’t hold down their liquor and own all the Qwik-E-Marts. Those are hindudes. We’ll get to them in a minute. The Indians were lousy servants because they had this funky attitude like “Why should we work for y’all motherfuckers when we was living here, eating deer, and minding our own business?” The settlers then decided to merc’k the Indians something like how the Red Sox are gonna kick Cleveland’s ass. Except the settlers did that shit more fly than the Red Sox. The settlers handed out blankets filled with smallpox.

Back to the issue at hand… Where would the settlers get more of the laborers and farmers that they need to capitalize on all the open space that the Indians were giving them? The key industry that made the Americas so valuable wasn’t so much precious metals or minerals, but agricultural products. Unlike Europe, which was mostly craggy and cold, the Americas were a fertile, healthy landscape where all types of plants, fruits and vegetables prospered in. You know how much cake you could make in Europe selling agricultural products? Wild amounts. The settlers needed bodies to help them stack that guap, ya’ dig?!? But even better than bodies, the settlers needed specialized farmers.

In the old country farmers were the backbone of the community. You could trust the man that spent his waking hours digging in the dirt or driving the team. The plowman was literally the salt of the Earth. This motherfucker walked behind the team of animals and by the end of the day he was up to his knees in shit and animal piss, because you can’t tell an ox or a mule when or where to shit and piss. They do that shit and it becomes fertilizer for the crops. That’s why the plowman can’t come into the house to eat. Mom dukes ain’t having that fool track animal shit all around the house. The plowman sits out back and gets his meals sent through the kitchen window. In Germany, or Deutschland, or whatever the fuck they called that shit, the plowman was called the negger. That described his job. That’s what the people called him. No big deal either, and keep in mind this is whites calling other whites this shit.

At that point in time the human condition didn’t separate themselves by skin complexion, but by language and respective nationality. The idea of using skintone as a system for separating people was adopted by the Europeans from the hindudes who had a setup that divided their priests from their farmers and manual laborers. The hindudes caste system appeared to the Europeans as social stratification according to skintone since the priests were essentially lighter skinned than the farmers. No big surprise to me though since the farmers were outdoors all of the time. Anyhoo, the Europeans never really bother to ask questions about shit they don’t understand, they shoot first and let God do all the sorting and paperwork. The Europeans needed farmers in the Americas and there were some damn good farmers in Africa, or Nubia, or whatever the fuck they called that shit back then. The Europeans had found their neggers.

og

At that time the Europeans from the north called dark skinned people Schwarz. That’s the Deutschland word for black. The Europeans struck a deal with the a-rabs from the Mediterraenean region to deliver them some of the best farmers and laborers from the fertile regions inside central Africa, or Nubia, or… You know where the fuck I’m talking about. The a-rabs have been doing this slave ship since the Code of Hammurabi days so that was nothing for them. The a-rabs were slick and they played the Africans against one another. They basically had the Hebrew farmers in the central region stuck up by the gentile Africans. Most of you so-called Black people here in America are actually Jews, but that is a whole ‘nother Sunday school drop.

Check this foxy shit out… White don’t play that shit when it comes to keeping his stacks in order. Why you think he labeled an area of Africa the ivory coast? Or the gold coast? Because that is where he steals that shit from. That dude is so hardbody that he labels the map to tell him where to go to get the natural resource he wants. He labeled a whole region in central Africa NEGGER because that was the shit he was mining from that region. Negger eventually begets Niger just like tomatoe begets tomato. They are the same things no matter how they are spelled now. Shitloads of schwarze neggers are brought to the Americas from Africa.

FYI, Billy X. Sunday Fun Fact: Schwarze Negger = Black Plowman

Back to the lesson… The schwarze naggers aren’t just brought to America for their agricultural skills and their labor. They are brought here under a systemic organized platform of terror. Families are purposely separated. People from the same ‘hood are also divided and deposited in different areas. There was never a system of slavery on this planet that treated the human with such an utter lack of humanity. Being a plowman was never this bad. America’s neggers were the beasts of burden and not the oxen. Let’s face it though. If you are gonna do some shit that is fucked the fuck up you might as well do it like you’re doing it for t.v. Despite all the bullshit these neggers perservered. I call that God’s sense of grace, because there were millions of people that didn’t survive the four months at sea in the cramped hull of a boat while they slept in their shit, piss, vomit and blood. If you ended up in America you were meant to be here.

Fast forward past all that Civil War shit to the time in America when manufacturing and industrialization supplanted agriculture as the steam machine that powered our GDP/GNP. America began to develop a class of people that were not land owners nor farmers. The people that still worked in agriculture typically did not own the lands that they labored upon. There were African Americans that were becoming educated and even land owners themselves. This is when the word nigger becomes a slur. It no longer describes the persons occupation, but in a manner it assigns a caste to the person. To tell someone that no matter how straight their hair is, or how fancy their clothes are they will always be subservient is a statement of social mobility.

og

The word nigger was used mostly by the transplanted immigrants from Germany and Ireland. They escaped famine and disease in their former homelands only to find that America was not so much the land of wealth as it was the land where you maintained a racial hegemony. If you didn’t maintain this color line you jeopardized your possibility at achieving the ultimate cultural lottery ticket which was to step into the ruling class. This is how supremacy works and it is the obligation of white to keep this shit rocking or else we could have a chink as the president one day. Yeah racism sucks wild balls, but what other choices do we have? I don’t care who your favorite rapper is, racism, and the word nigger is here to stay.

The reason I give you this drop today is to support NaSir Jones and the projected title of his latest album. White created the word nigger and they used to call each other the word too. Most likely as a term of affection I might add. I can see some old European land owner standing on his porch and looking over his land as Johann or Bernhard or whatever the fuck his name was worked in the field. That’s when the land owner would say to his fellow land owner, “Johann is my nigger.” I don’t think it’s right to forbid white from using the word nigger, especially not from forbidding him to call other white nigger either. How else are white going to be able to request the title track from NaS’ new album on the radio? You know white is going to be buying that shit too.

Now that we have agreed on the name for NaS’ new album can we help my nigga select some beats?

stillmatic

THE GREATEST RAPPER TERNT SANGER ALIVE…

Thursday, October 18th, 2007

lil wang

BILLY X. SUNDAY got the block on lock at XXL Mag Dot Com.

I’m listening to the Carter III advance and I’m looking for a sign that Lil’ Wang is going to take over this rap shit. Something to make me shut the fuck up about his rhyming skillset. Something to make me realize how talented this dude supposedly is. I’m just not hearing it though. The beats from the C III preview are some of the best joints that Wayne has ever had to rhyme over. There’s still something that dude is short on. Maybe it’s too much of that syrup in his blood?

There’s a track with Babyface on the hook and Mr.West on the beats. Most people would say that is the sure shot hit, but I don’t feel like Wang goes in hard enough [ll]. There’s another track called ‘Kiss Me Baby’ and just the title make me laugh my ass off. Thank God nowhere on that song did I hear Wayne talk about lip-locking his record label owner and surrogate father. Whew! Then I came up on the real hit on the advance. Lil’ Wang doesn’t even rhyme on this joint. Maybe that’s why it was so good.

Lil’ Wang lets one of his weedcarriers and presumably his best ghostwriter do all the rhyming. That was a good move. The next power move Wang made was to sing, nee sang, like a goofier Akon, or an O.D.B. on the drank. Wang gets wild on some talkbox vocoder type shit that all the kids are doing now, except Wang is perfect for the talkbox like Roger Troutman was because Wang just says whatever is on his mind. Kind of like how I blog on this XXL Mag Dot Com shit.

This is how Lil’ Wang is going to take over the music business. He is going to become the greatest rapper ternt sanger alive. Imagine T-Pain on that HGH with a Maybach space shuttle parked out back by the pool. This shit is about to get crazy. The Black Robin Thicke is Weezy KissyFace and he ain’t playing no more. I expect to hear duets with Amy Winehouse and Lily Allen. Fuck that, Weezy and Madonna in concert together. Madonna Effs Baby. And with that talkbox shit Lil’ Wang can team up with Daft Punk and Donna Summer and bring disco music back. Do you not see the potential of this Carter III R & B album?

I was totally wrong about Lil’ Wang and his Carter III project and this song made me see the light. So put on your shades, your shiny spacesuit and get you a Solo cup of that “Lean”…


LIL’ WAYNE – About U