Archive for May, 2006

BABY ‘BACHS ARE A BEAST

Sunday, May 7th, 2006

benz 5-0-0

I am not all sick over whips and in a few hours I will talk to you about stealing cars. People put way too much stock and relevance into the material shit in their lives. We let these things define us and represent us. But there is a temporal nature to material items that you have to recognize. What is considered ‘hot’ today will not be popular tomorrow because having permenance doesn’t support the capitalistic machine.

Now when you look at automobiles you are looking at one of our greatest guilty pleasures. Their value is in the convenience that they allow us to travel from point ‘A’ to point ‘B’. Their value isn’t in the item itself since cars depreciate the second you first turn the key in the ignition. That’s why I never get too hype over cars. Their purpose is to work for you. There is no point in having something pretty if you can’t use it. I guess that is the broke dude in me coming out against cars because I do own way more sneakers than I have feet for.

Still, every now and then my eyes see something that I recognize for its acheivemement in technical engineering. Mercedes got this one off biggtime with their new S-class sedans. This is going to be the new rapper luxury car pushing the BMW 745i out of the frame. Mercedes is sick because they put shit into a car that you didn’t even realize that you wanted. Leave it to the Germans to invent the air conditioned steering wheel and variable speed power ass massagers(no JAKE GYLLENHAAL). The new S class even invokes the image of Mercedes premier division, Maybach.

maybach

I don’t plan on selling out, but if a job came through with the Negro Network or the supremracist Massa Tell lies Vision I might have to consider what is more important to me, leaning back with the devil, or doing the Timberland two-step and keeping my principals.

G DUBBZ Got That SNOW Man

Sunday, May 7th, 2006

got that snow

I am fully convinced that extra-terrestrials run this rap shit. Do you see your man TONY SNOW’s massive head?!? No SHERYL SWOOPES to that last sentence. Homeboy’s superized domepiece is on some evil villian Brainiac type jawn. This dude might be reading my mind right now.

brainiac

The Prez tabbed this guy to spin for the Administration. He is going to be the guy that explains why we are going after Iran. SNOW would be better to spin the story about why we are going to Mars or something like that because he has the E.T. Roswell cranium. Whatever he ends up talking about his work is cut out for him. Let’s see if he can turn this pile of shiite into pate…

All of G DUBBZ right wing homies are bailing on his Administration. It turns out that conservatives are as fickle as fiends and the cracks inside the BUSH regime aren’t the kind that you can smoke.

CIA Director ups and quits without giving his two weeks notice. The CIA has been embattled under the Administration more than ever, and with the war drums being beaten again to the tune of Iranian dance music I wonder where the intel will come from that confirms the Turban’s WMD’s(Wild Man Dreams). Secretly, I wonder if Mr.GOSS had an issue with working under someone whose name began with NEGRO

The American casualty rate in Iraq remains at a steady climb as does the rate of unemployment here in the States. Were not creating jobs fast enough and we aren’t holding the right levels of troops overseas despite what the President might be telling people. TONY SNOW should try to put the guest worker program within the Army, calling it the ‘Guest Soldier Initiative’.

Damn I’m good, I should move to the Beltway.

CRAZY RON ARTEST WALLPAPER

Sunday, May 7th, 2006

tru warier?

Who’s your boy?!?

Crazy RON might be on vacation now, but don’t let that stop you from enjoying his individual display of high maintenance follicular design.

TRU WARIER? I say tru jeenyuss.

Americans Don’t Kill Illegal Immigrants, Coconut Macaroons Kill Illegal Immigrants

Saturday, May 6th, 2006

coconut macaroons

With all the negative media psoturing that is equating Mexicans with illegal immigration there is bound to be a reactionary fallout in the middle of America. The Germans are always having violent clashes with their immigrant population and the American heartland is chock full of German-Americans(read: children of immigrants).

My only experience with an illegal immigrant living in the U.S. was in the office that I used to work at. This chick from Romania overstayed her visa and she never had the fear of being deported. Albeit, this was before Septmber 11, but still she never had the sense that she needed to become an American citizen. The sad story with this girl was when she brought her moms over to the States from Romania. Her moms loved watching soap operas and eating coconut macaroons. I guess they didn’t have those things in Eastern Europe. Her moms ended up eating a whole box of macaroons and they coagulated in her stomach and formed a blockage. Her mom was dead after being in America for only two weeks.

Shit like that never happened in communist countries where people were only allowed one macaroon per household. I don’t hate immigrants since I recognize their value to America. You shouldn’t hate them either. And never feed them coconut macaroons

HAIKU FOR THE REPO MAN

Saturday, May 6th, 2006

polobear


In coldest darkness
Towtruck tows fatboy’s black truck
Lease due anyhoo