Archive for January, 2009

Shadow Clones And Invisible Men…

Tuesday, January 13th, 2009

shadowtrooper

Just when you thought that America’s deep-seeded and institutionalized racism was the worst on our planet we get reminded of the people who popped that ‘Us vs. Them’ thing off when it comes to ethnicity and skin color.

The British society has been more mentally brutal and oppressive in the lives of the ‘other’ than any government you might imagine. Moreso than even the Dutch, who were just generally brutal to everyone that wasn’t Dutch.

The Brits created a fierce desire in their subjects to attain nationality, no matter what the cost. Here in America we have soldiers from Mexico and Ecuador fighting for us but they know that their families will receive a few pesos when they die.

The ‘other’ that soldiers for Britain does so out of a sense of faux-nationalism that somehow their sacrifice will make England stronger. Ain’t that a blip from Blipsburg? People getting their asses shit the fuck off for a flag and an anthem.

I wonder if soldiers from the ‘other’ even get a nice folded flag mailed to their moms flat when they don’t return? Black soldiers in Britain get little else for their troubles. No promotions, no commendations and no effin’ respect. I point you to this article…

Long March Of The Black British Soldier

After remarks were made by the Prince of England on a videotaped training session describing one of the servicemen as, “our little Paki friend, Ahmed” there has been widespread handwringing in England. All of a sudden the Brits act like they accidentally imported racism from America along with the sugar.

The truth of the matter is that serviceman was a diminutive Pakistani born soldier. A British subject, and proud of it is what my great-grandmother might say since she held tight to her roots in Nevis. I don’t think Ahmed took offense to this remark for one minute. Mostly because racism is so integral a component within the Western military system that you have to divorce yourself from the reality of your birthskin.

Seriously speaking, who the hell is Ahmed going to be lobbing missiles at? People that will more than likely look like he does. Ahmed’s name might as well become Paki since it can no longer describe his origins or his culture. This is the true story of the clones. They have forsaken individualism for the idea of a faceless state. The clones are as much victims as the people on the other side of their blaster rifles.

They are invisible men with no country and no homeland so don’t even try to look into their eyes to find a soul.

shadowtrooper

DP On Twitter…

Tuesday, January 13th, 2009

3000

I have just reached the aw3s0me benchmark (for me) of having 500 people subscribe to my Twitter feed. To celebrate this momentous occasion I have developed some software that I believe will be the future of social netwoking.

“Am using this software that allows me to chat on AIM, Gmail, MySpace, Friendster, BlackPlanet and my Skype acct.

It’s called Sphinctron3000”

Not to be confused with the Sphincter 3000…

3000

Endorsed by Andre3000

3000

Twit with me @ DP2FTV

Hot Rickey Over Rice…

Tuesday, January 13th, 2009

ricey

I know my ass is getting old when I start seeing my childhood heroes voted into the various Halls of Fame. The MLB Hall Of Fame has selected two of my favorite players to be inducted during this year’s ceremony.

JIM RICE – The quintessential slugger and Boston Red Sox outfielder. Think of ALBERT BELLE, before ALBERT BELLE. The Boston press corps hated RICE like he had broken into their house and stole their Christmas presents. All RICE did was hit the ball. Far, and a lot. RICE was part of the great hittting outfielders of this era who could hit for power and placement. He didn’t simply slug home runs but he hit singles, doubles and the rarest triples all with aplomb.

Way before steroids had infiltrated baseball you would find that the best hitters were multi-dimensional. VLAD GUERRERO is a throwback to JIM RICE, ANDRE DAWSON, DALE MURPHY and DAVE PARKER. I wonder what these players numbers might have been if they had access to the cream and the clear?

RICKEY HENDERSON – This man needs no introduction whatsoever. If you were making an all-time fantasy league team you would definitely have to select RICKEY HENDERSON without reservation. His numbers are undeniable. He ranks first in stolen bases, first in runs scored, second overall in walks and fourth all time in games played. HENDERSON did log in 25 seasons.

HENDERSON was so fun to watch early in his career with Oakland. He definitely is the O.G. baseball player with swagger. HENDERSON knew that he pwned the game back then. Some of RICKEY’s reported antics have tarnished his legacy among a few of his fans, but for the rest of us I think we can separate the player from the propaganda of the press. What I respect about RICKEY and JIM RICE is that they played the game of baseball with no apologies despite how poorly they may have been described by the sportswriters.

Now let’s see if these sphincter hat sportswriters can get the big homey Hawk in next year…

Ho’s Throughout History…

Monday, January 12th, 2009

esther

Since we have had some decent threads of late relating to the Middle East I thought I would keep the party rocking with this little treat.

I was at my favorite store in the impoverished ‘hood of Hempstead when I came across the doll action figure pictured above. Her name is Esther and she was one of the concubines to a Persian king. I forget dude’s name but we all know it wasn’t Xerxes since that dude was teh gheyer than a motherfucker. I’ll assume you saw 300.

The deal with Esther is that one of the Persian king’s generals was all pissed off with the Jews (yeah, I know, what else is new?) since the Jews wouldn’t bow down to anyone so this general drafted up a plot to kill all the Jews and the what not. Esther got wind of the plot and tried to prevent it from going down. She cooked up a crazy feast for the king and then laid up with him that night and then followed that up with another consecutive night of feasting and fisting with the B.J. combo on the side.

The king was totally sprung and told Esther that she could have whatever she likes *sings T.I. song* (not tall Israeli, but T.I.). Esther asked the king to spare the Jews and kill the general that was popping off this bullshit. The king was so smitten with Esther that he told the Jews to arm themselves and kill off their enemies, including the enemies’ wives and the children. So in this manner we can see that the situation in Gaza is simply another chapter in the longest story ever told.

What I enjoyed the most though is the fact that A.J. Wright was having a 50% off sale on all toys marked down on clearance. The Esther action figure was only $5 bucks. Yeah those three kings were wise. They knew well enough to shop during the “after Christmas” sales. My Hebrew frugality stays winning.

Quoth the Raven, Nevermore…

Monday, January 12th, 2009

flacco

I have learned over the last several years that I should never bet against either the Ravens or the Eagles. I just need to to leave those teams alone forevermore (no EDGAR ALLEN POE).

The interesting note about the Ravens vs. Titans tilt is that the game was actually won in favor of the Titans defense in statistics only. The Titans gained more yards, secured more first downs and held the ball longer than the Ravens. Unfortunately for the Titans, the Ravens still managed to score more points. The bend but doesn’t break defense lives to play another game.

Really Carolina, KURT WARNER?!? This isn’t 1999. Or is it? Damn you CHERICA ADAMS. The ghost of RAE CARRUTH’s dead baby moms and stillborn fetus continues to shit on the post season dreams of the Carolina Panthers.

What happened to BRANDON JACOBS? He couldn’t get it done when it mattered. He should shoot himself with PLAXICO’s pistol.

The Steelers look like they are so ’bout it right now. How about that? An all Penn state Super Bowl is possible. I think I see CANDICE doing a two-step.

titans DP = 144pts
QB – Donovan McNabb = 23pts
RB – Chris Johnson = 16pts
WR – Hines Ward = 7pts
TE – Antonio Gates = 5pts
FLEX- Steve Smith = 10pts
K- David Akers = 11pts
D/ST- Tennessee = 0pts

steelers Big Homie = 175pts
QB – Donovan McNabb = 23pts
RB – Le’Ron McClain = 1pt
WR – Larry Fitzgerald = 22pts
TE – Kevin Boss = 5pts
FLEX- Steve Smith – 10pts
K- David Akers = 11pts
D/ST- Steelers = 11pts

ravens Big Rils = 122pts
WR – Santonio Holmes = 8pts
WR – Larry Fitzgerald = 22pts
TE – Antonio Gates = 5pts
FLEX – DeAngelo Williams = 6pts
D/ST – Baltimore = 5pts

steelers Dirty Jerz = 95pts
QB – Joe Flacco = 14pts
RB – Willie Parker = 26pts
RB – Brian Westbrook = 4pts
FLEX – DeAngelo Williams = 6pts
K – Jeff Reed = 5pts
D/ST – Steelers = 11pts

giants Fresh2Def = 141pts
WR-Steve Smith = 10pts
WR-Larry Fitzgerald = 22pts
TE-Antonio Gates = 5pts
FLEX- Brian Westbrook = 4pts
D/ST-Giants = 4pts

ravens LM = 126pts
QB-Philip Rivers = 33pts
RB-Chris Johnson = 16pts
RB-Derrick Ward = 7pts
WR-Hines Ward = 7pts
TE-Todd Heap = 2pts
FLEX- Brian Westbrook = 4pts
K-John Kasay = 1pts
D/ST-Ravens = 5pts

ravens King Blair = 158pts
WR-Steve Smith = 10pts
WR-Larry Fitzgerald = 22pts
TE-Antonio Gates = 5pts
FLEX- Brian Westbrook = 4pts
D/ST-Ravens = 5pts

steelers Bert = 132pts
RB – Brian Westbrook = 4pts
WR – Hines Ward = 7pts
TE – Kevin Boss = 5pts
FLEX – Chris Johnson = 16pts
K – Matt Stover = 7pts
D/ST – Steelers = 11pts

titans BigNat = 68pts
QB- Eli Manning = 8pts
RB- Chris Johnson = 16pts
WR- Steve Smith = 10pts
FLEX- Brian Westbrook = 4pts
K- Rob Bironas = 4pts
D/ST- Titans = 0pts