Archive for the ‘5000’ Category

Back From The Future

Monday, November 21st, 2011

Editor’s note: All praise due to Combat Jack for getting me two(2) bylines in the latest issue of The Source…

Were you caught up in all the hype of the release of the Nike Air Mag shoes nicknamed the ‘Marty McFly’ after the lead character in the Back 2 The Future movie franchise? The pricetag might have been somewhat prohibitive however if you work at McDonald’s, or worse, write for a living. But if Hip-Hop has taught us anything it has enabled us to spot trends in advance of their blooming so that we can get in on the pop culture action from the ground floor.

Who better than The Source magazine then to spotlight some of the trends which will take over the culture in the next few years. Invest in these trends now and by 2015 you can flip these off to your friends for a sizable profit.

2012 – Apocalypto Rap – The Mayan calendar ends in the year 2012 which also coincides with the birth of Jay-Z and BeYonce’s first child. Will this baby be the savior of the Earth or the messenger of death? Neither, but the child’s birth will spawn the subgenre of rap music dedicated to decoding the book of Revelations. If you think Jay-Z’s book ‘Decoded’ was a bestseller get a load of this joint called the ‘Bible’. No, I mean read the Bible.

2013 – Scarface 30 year anniversary – What in the world is more Hip-Hop than the movie Scarface? And what is more romanticized than selling drugs to people you live with because going to school or working to build your community is just too fucking hard? On the 30th anniversary of this seminal film in Hip-Hop culture we will see a rebirth of recreational crack cocaine use. You can either smoke it or sell it (trust us, sell it) but you had better buy yourself a whole lot of it now before the price skyrockets. Beam me up Scotty.

2014 – Illmatic 20 year anniversary – Something that is also very Hip-Hop is nostalgia and reminiscing on the good ol’ days. You know, the days you used to catch lightning bugs in jelly jars and ride your Big Wheel on the sidewalk, before you would have to sell crack to your neighbors. On the 20th anniversary of what most rap bloggers have determined is Hip-Hop’s greatest album we see a flood of CD’s titled in homage to NaS’ classic… Trillmatic from Bun B, MeekMillmatic, Pillmatic, and IllBillmatic. I even predict Sean Price will release Brownsvillematic which is actually his Mic Tyson album that was due to drop in 2010.

2015 – The reconstruction of the World Trade Center site is finally completed and Biggie’s line from ‘Juicy’ is permanently deleted from the song, lest the new WTC site get blowed the fuck up again.

2016 – End of the world – Kiss your sweet ass goodbye because its all going to end this year around the time of the WNBA playoffs.

ZUCOTTI LOCKOUT…

Sunday, November 20th, 2011

While my computer’s been down this past week I haven’t been able to post any info from the frontlines of AmeriKKKa’s class war that is the Occupy Wall Street movement.

Protestors sleeping in Zucotti Park were raided by police and were arrested for trespassing and other related offenses like the crime of being in the wrong place at the wrong time.

Now that this pandora’s box of protests has been flung wide open I wonder if we can ever go back to being a country that trampled people over flat screen TV’s? Wait!? The new iPhone is being released with an app that talks to you? My bad. Carry on capitalism.

Making Money Up Under You Since 1996…

Tuesday, November 15th, 2011

I fux with this Roc-A-Wear tee. Why the hell should it make any money for the Occupy Wall Street movement? The only person it needs to make money for is the manufacturer.

You ever seen these t-shirts? I couldn’t tell you how many were bought or sold. I just know that the people who own the cotton-stitching machine are satisfied with the outcome.

Occupy Wall Street can’t own the word ‘occupy’ or the idea of sitting in somewhere just to get your point across. As long as the people who own the means to production ans distribution are comfortable the beat goes on. Occupy that.

The Punk Smoove Rap Balladeer…

Friday, November 11th, 2011

drake

Rap music’s creative juggernaut Aubrey ‘Drake’ Graham is putting out his second album titled ‘Take Care’. Drake is the Rap Sade, the Rap Barry Manilow, the Rap Michael Bolton, the Rap Adele, the leader in dropping that punk smoove shit.

I’m not mad at this album because it is exactly what you would have expected from Drake. This is music for the ladies. And the ladies who will get fellas to put on some mothbit grandma knit sweater just to meet her parents at Thanksgiving dinner.

This is music for the newly cuffed, and those who wish they had been cuffed. This is music for the heartbreakers, but mostly for the brokenhearted. Don’t cry internets, dry your eyes because you won’t feel like this forever. This album won’t last past Valentine’s Day and by then you’ll have fallen in and out of love 100 more times.

I know Drake will.


‘Over My Dead Body’


‘Crew Love’ featuring The Weeknd


‘We’ll be Fine’ featuring Kendrick Lamar


‘Hell Ya’ Fuckin’ Right’ featuring Lil’ Wayne

You wanna read a great ‘Take Care’ review?

Log on to GhostFase Kisser

drake

Rest In Peaceful Jouney…

Wednesday, November 9th, 2011

Peace to the Heavster for try’na be greater than anyone expected him to be. Peace to him for engineering this track for the children. Teach the babies Internets.

Heavy D, Kool G Rap, Grand Puba, CL Smooth, Big Daddy Kane, Pete Rock and Q-Tip won’t curse